Strength in my Lord

Last week I had the privilege of attending Women's Conference at BYU. I am grateful for my extended family that kept at me, so that I would attend. I needed it. I needed it more than I can explain. I needed the strength that I gained from the spirit of so many faithful to the Lord, from so many inspirational talks, from a family that gave me love so unconditionally, for the new friends I met and felt a kinship to immediately. I needed to find my testimony again. I needed to be where I began this journey, where I was when my sweet Rhiannon blessed my life. I needed all of these things for when I returned home my Savior was with me. He was with me as I traveled down the path that seems to be forced my way, more frequently than I thought I had the strength to endure but I do have the strength. I can do anything with my Savior's love. I can endure everything that is handed me if only I will look to my Father to carry me, to hold my hand through the darkest hours, to keep me calm, to bless my children and to show my gratitude for everyone in my life that is here when I need them, even when I seem to call so often for their help, their love, their strength. Today I am exhausted, but I am at peace. I followed the promptings of the Holy Ghost, I listened, for once in a long time I left the channels open so that I could hear, so that I would know how to respond, how to love more than I have ever loved. The healing begins today, the forgiveness, the hope for something better. I am thankful for so many things this morning, for a wonderful family, strong children, the gospel that maintains me, great friends that love us, leaders that are always here when we need them. I pray for people not to judge and to only love and I pray that this road is closed and I will never have to travel it again. Loughlin was with me in this journey, I could hear him whisper to me, suck it up mom, you can do this, you are strong, I am with you always, just look over your shoulder, I will be there.