Today is just a missing day. I woke up missing Loughlin almost more than I could bear. I sent the kids to school with Harlen, because the thought of driving the road with the sun up in the sky was more than I could do. I watched True play baseball last night remembering how much I loved to watch Loughlin play that game and how nervous I always was for him. Every moment of this day has been so tender. Oh how I wish he was here. I am tired of putting up the good fight, just tired. I just wish for one more day of seeing his sweet smile. I sometimes wonder what hell is like. I think now it might feel a lot like losing your son at your own hands. It isn't helpful to wonder what life would be like had all of this not happened but I do. I am having a pity party today and all are invited just bring a tub of Mocha almond fudge if you come.
1 comment:
Pity parties are sometimes very necessary, and fudge, or any form of chocolate should be mandatory. I hope today is less painful, and more happy. Just take it an hour at a time. :)
Amy
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