All of my angels

In the midst of the heartache, there have been so many angels surrounding me. Earth angels that have held me up when I could not stand myself, that have called or emailed me on my darkest days, others that have posted words of encouragement on my posts, neighbors and friends that have gave more than anyone should be asked to give. I am grateful for them all. I am in awe at the love shown to my family, at the arms that are out stretched to give me that much needed hug, for those kind words that are spoken or written on my behalf. My heart is full.

Everyday I wake up with a hopeful heart that the day will be better than the one previous. Some days, that dream comes true, other days I have a hard time even breathing. I live just 200 yards from where Loughlin died. I drive up and down that road 6 or 7 times a day. It hits me hard every time I do. It is like an invisible wall that I pass through, it takes my joy, it takes my breath and leaves me alone and sad and nauseated. I live the day over and over and over again in my mind. It zaps my energy and removes any chance of keeping the smile on my face. Cooking, laundry, homework, chores, all remind me that Loughlin is gone. It is hard to muster the courage for another day but with the love and help of others, I know I can do this. It is a process, a long hard, exhausting process, but somehow my family will make it through, with all of your love and prayers we will make it through.

Thank you!