One month out and I still await Harlen's return at night. Nothing feels right. I am so tired all of the time. My shoulders feel like they are carrying the weight of the world, literally. My memory is shot. My cognitive skills are not so great either. i fell last Saturday and tore the cartilage in my ribs which makes laughing, hard and crying even harder. I knew this was going to be hard, but I underestimated the grief. I miss him so very much. The death certificates came in the mail today, 5 just in case I needed that many. Tomorrow could be a better day. I hope it is
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