Fear

A new year

A well known fear

The future isn t clear.

Hoping death is near.

I put up a good fight.

The victory is never in sight.

In the darkness ,little light.

Everything I try nothing is right.

I am exhausted from trying.

My eyes are dry from crying.

My mind tires of lying .

My thoughts centered on dying.

I am a failure in every way.

Good intentions everyday.

A lifetime crushed with what you say.

Never again will life be okay.

A noose would be sufficient.

A gun, I am proficient.

Tylenol, the most efficient.

Ask God he is omniscient.

Can a pin cushion wear out?

With your God I have no clout.

He keeps poking and sticking, abandoning the pins in.

Leaving bitter reminders of where I have been.

There's some empty spaces left if you maneuver.

The love is gone what's left is only a reprover.

He has been through so much pain.

Hitting him harder what do you have to gain?

Let him alone.

Lend him your throne.

Stability is what  he needs.

He's only human of course he bleeds.

His heart is damaged beyond repair.

But you keep on poking through his despair.

Fair?

Of course not you. You taught me at 8.

Teaching me that Hell is my only fate.

God he is begging down on his knees. 

His mom is crying while you ignore her pleas.

You enjoy using me as your muse.

Leaving no marks a pin prick, no bruise.

Will you be satisfied when you have it all?

School me once again, you are the almighty and I am so small.

I have no power. You have stolen it from me.

I am blind. I am deaf and now I can't speak.

The carnage around is deep and it reaks.

I call uncle. I submit

I never thought that would happen. I'll admit.

Just leave my kids alone. Cyrus being persecuted at BSU for his Christian beliefs.

"They want you to sit not stand.
For what you believe in. Clench your hand.
To show your passion. Your face is red.
But it has been that way from birth until your dead.
See no evil. Hear no evil, don't speak it either.
Toe the line, don't use your mind. Be a believer.
There is a war a brewing. 
Stop what you are doing. 
Pay attention to the cause.
The bloodied should make you pause.
A revolution in your own mind. 
Don't leave the One on the cross behind.
He is the only hope. 
Without it is just a rope.
Peace is found in the Creator.
Love in the heart there is nothing greater."
Me

Please pray for Cyrus as he is just 8 days from graduating as an exemplary student. The administration at Boise State is treating Cyrus like a criminal. They said his speech of Christ was threatening. My God where has this world gone? Hell would be the correct answer.

On the upside I have found my faith again. When you have no where else to go God is the answer. I prayed that someone would step up to help Cyrus and the next morning the American Center For Law and Justice agreed to represent Cyrus. Hoping for the best but preparing for the worst.