Day 6 of my detoxification

I have made it 6 days while detoxifying from the poison passed off as a helpful drug. I have spent these days suffering from nausea, vomiting, dizziness, foggy mind, shaking, tired and really completely miserable, but i can see a light at the end of the tunnel. I want my personality back. And I was funny this morning. I used to could come up with a song for every situation. I did it again yesterday and not just once, but many times. I am not having racing thoughts. I am mostly tired. I am hoping for a better life after this toxin is out of my body, drinking a cup of coffee without spilling because of the shaking and jerking.   Hopeful once again. 💔😅

My parents are getting old. I am not ready for life without them. :(

This week has been so stressful. Our insurance cancelled us again because they said our payment was 4 days late. so much confusion this year with this company. Nightmare is generous. They sent us a refund because we paid too much then cancelled for non-payment. My surgery was in 10 days. Stress.

Friday my mom was admitted to the hospital with a BP of 60/52, pneumonia and strep. She was on her death bed. They said if she wouldn't have come in she would have died in her sleep. They gave her fluids, antibiotics through the IV. Sunday night she was doing better. They let her go home Monday.

This morning my dad couldn't get up. My brother couldn't help him up. The ambulance came and took him to the hospital. He has a blood infection, a blood clot from his groin to his knee. His Blood Pressure fell so much that they had to put adrenaline in his heart. He is in the ICU today.

My mom is important in my life. My dad talks to me every morning before Rush starts. I call at 9:45 and we talk until the radio program starts. He is my lifeline sometimes, a lot of times. My mom has been sick a lot this year.  It's hard to see them get old, struggle. My dad was the strongest man I knew. Is he still?

The insurance re-instated us this morning. My surgery is Thursday at 11:30 am. I will be on liquids for 2 weeks. I will be having Christmas dinner in a blender. How fun and exciting :)

I didn't get my house clean before, the tree is kind of decorated, and the Christmas cards are printed without a poem or without being labeled. It could be interesting.

I need a lot of luck!

I love Hospitals

I was scheduled for a endoscopy and colonoscopy on Friday. Thursday I started the "cleaning out" process. I started the drain at about 8pm. I had cramps in my back and could barely leave the bathroom. I never slept all of Thursday night. I have a very sensitive stomach and I was miserable. So nothing to eat after Thursday 8pm, and nothing to drink after 4am Friday. I was in good spirits when I got there. (well I hate hospitals and my anxiety was huge) I went in for the procedure and they could not give me enough pain medicine. I was hurting, waking up out of a dead sleep to horrendous pain. They said they couldn't give me anymore meds and it wasn't controlling the pain. I made it through though.

I went home and slept. Saturday I still felt terrible, but Harlen wanted to get the house cleaned up, so I got up and helped, unwillingly. Sunday I started feeling better, but by the night my stomach was getting nauseated. I went to bed, woke up at 1am with horrendous acid reflux. It felt like it was burning my up from the inside out. It was one of my worst bouts. I threw up and I threw up. I threw up so hard I wet my pants. So I showered at 2am. I got out got dressed and started throwing up again. I threw up so hard I broke blood vessels in my eyes. I wet my pants again. (Getting old and having had 7 kids sucks) So I took my 2nd shower at about 3:30 am .

I got dressed and set pillows on my bed so that I was sitting and tried to get some sleep. It wasn't easy still. I was exhausted.

So last night I really needed some shut eye. I went to bed at 10. I had a small bit of reflux but slept through it. At 4 am I woke up with horrible diarrhea. The cramps were so bad up and down my back I was crying. It was with me on and off for the rest of the night and even this morning. I hope this is not a complication from the colonoscopy. I would rather throw up any day of the week.

I have one more test to complete and hopefully the Doc will agree to the surgery. It is hard to be a good wife and mom when you never feel good.

Yesterday Giles played football against Vale, ( the rival team) . I don't understand the rival because I never grew up here. They won 16-8. Everyone was excited. I was mmmmmmm . Giles didn't play much. I wish he would have just had fun instead of insisting on playing a sport he could really get hurt in.
Today Lea plays her 2nd to last volleyball game. She loves it and is going to miss it.

Finding Answers to my health problems

I completed one test on Friday and I have 2 left most likely leading to surgery. 1/2 of my stomach is above my diaphragm . ( worse than the picture). I am sick quite often,3/5 days a week. I throw up. I have acid reflux that goes all the way up my nose. I wake up in a dream I am drowning and I am downing in my own acid. I am so tired. I can't go back to sleep afterwards.

I am worried about the outcome of the further tests but I am also relieved to know there could be an end to this part of my misery in life. Friday is my next test, an Endoscopy and Colonoscopy. Sounds like a party at my house Friday night. haha. You know it is bad when I am letting someone go that way on me. I am scared and grossed out. Immature perhaps but that is me. Hopefully I can get this fixed before the end of the year.

Wish me luck.