In church today our relief society lesson was on apostatizing. One comment by the teacher was to the fact, that if you have enough faith trials will not be hard. Do you think that is true? Or is it as I believe that trials are hard and prayer and faith only soften the tribulation and anguish you go through.
I walk through my life everyday wondering if I will make it this hour without breaking down, wondering if I can stay strong, wondering if my prayers will comfort the pain, wondering if I will ever feel as if I can breath normally again. I walk through life a little stifled, wondering what is next, wondering if the Lord will still send more trials my way and hoping I can get through more if they do come. I hope for a kind word from a friend but shy away from crowds because I am afraid of the looks that are aimed in my direction, the watching to see if I can actually withstand this mortal life's trials. It is a funny way to live, always expecting something in return but not willing to stick my heart on the line to receive the blessings that are out there for the grabbing. I have a hard time even opening up to my husband. The walls that I am building today will be hard to bring down. I know this yet I still build them bigger and stronger than I did before. I am still a slow learner.
Our sale is Tuesday. I hope it goes well. I have lots of things that need to be done but I cannot get excited about any of them.
2 comments:
I believe as you do. We are always going to have trials but w/o faith we couldn't make it thru them. We also never know how we will be able to handle them till we are forced to. You are a great friend, mother and wife never doubt it. I hope you know you are in my thoughts and prayers always.
Love ya,
Amy
The deeper the pain, the more exquisite the joy. I think faith and hope keep you hanging on...and sometimes that's all we've got.
Faith is an action verb that requires work. I think the very idea of work is that we build strength by doing it...it's not easy. Faith can soften the pain of death, but it doesn't take away the hurt and the longing to hold our loved ones.
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